Lawyer Stuff (fwd)
David V. Rogers
Sat, 17 Jan 1998 09:22:02 -0500 (EST)
---------- Forwarded message ----------
Date: Fri, 16 Jan 1998 06:54:47 -0500 (EST)
Subject: Lawyer Stuff
Date: 98-01-15 21:53:53 EST
> A small town prosecuting attorney called his first witness to the
> stand in a trial--a grandmotherly, elderly woman. He approached her
> and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"
> She responded, "Why, yes, I do know you Mr. Williams. I've known
> you since you were a young boy. And frankly, you've been a big
> disappointment to me. You lie, you cheat on your wife, you manipulate
> people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a
> rising big shot when you haven't the brains to realize you never will
> amount to anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know
> The lawyer was stunned. Not knowing what else to do he pointed across
> the room and asked, "Mrs. Williams, do you know the defense attorney?"
> She again replied, "Why, yes I do. I've known Mr. Bradley since he was
> a youngster, too. I used to babysit him for his parents. And
> he, too, has been a real disappointment to me. He's lazy, bigoted, he
> has a drinking problem. The man can't build a normal relationship
> with anyone and his law practice is one of the shoddiest in the
> entire state. Yes, I know him."
> At this point, the judge rapped the courtroom to silence and called
> both counselors to the bench. In a very quiet voice, he said with
> menace, "If either of you asks her if she knows me, you'll be in jail
> for contempt within 5 minutes!"